The Best Gift


We decided to kick off our holidays by each of us telling y’all how the past month has been for us! As for Dad, here is the sweetest photo from the other day! He is obviously loving being Ruth’s Doo Dad! Have a very Merry Christmas from our family to yours!!



IMG_3177.jpeg🙂 Well I’m (partially) back at work and I just can’t believe how much I have to say to y’all. Do I only share 10%? Or do I write a novel? Or do I split my thoughts into several smaller novels? Lol. I don’t know!

I think I’ll start with this as a summary. For those of you who have met Nick, my husband, he is not a cryer. He’s sensitive and has feelings and is wonderful but that never expresses itself with tears. Ever. We had been in the hospital with Ruth for about 24 hours and out of nowhere Nick turns to me, face red, eyes puffy, tears streaming, and just said “I just want to make sure she’s always okay! How do we even do that?! How can we be sure she’s always okay?” That right there defines our introduction to parenthood: absolutely clueless, utterly afraid, but wonderfully committed to this little baby.

There may be nothing in the world so incapacitatingly humbling as having a little baby to care for and understanding fully that you do NOT have what it takes. Yes, I have what it takes to feed her and hold her and love her but am entirely lacking in so many ways.

My dad gave his life to Jesus in his thirties, and when asked what motivated that change in his life he, without hesitation, says it’s because he had Sarah now and he knew he somehow needed to be more than he was. He says “I just knew I had to be better. More.” I never necessarily understood that faith journey until now. After driving home from the hospital with the tiniest, sweetest, little helpless, fragile, perfect thing I completely and entirely understand. The combination of 1.)How on earth have I been appointed the highest honor and the heaviest responsibility to raise this baby and 2.)Who the hell thought it was a good idea to pick me?! I’m just me and she deserves more! That’s where Dad landed too. She deserves more. How can we become more than just ourselves to fuel and feed and fight for this little human? Thank God we don’t have to come by it naturally. Jesus, help us do this right and well with all the love, strength, wisdom, compassion, energy, you name it, that this little gal needs. Help us all be more for our people and all people, Lord.


I’ve said so many times over the last nine months “I’ve been waiting for this for a long time!” I’ve joyfully looked forward to being an aunt and dreamed of what kind of aunt I’d like to be! The most important thing, for me, is that my nieces and nephew know that I see them, I love them, I know them, I’m for them. Whatever that looks like, whatever it takes.

I bought an Advent study and prayer guide this year to help me stay focused not just on the reason for the season but on the reason for my life! If my heart isn’t constantly pursuing knowing Jesus and being known by Him then what am I doing?! A lot of the book pre-baby was about waiting, trusting, believing—how timely! While waiting for Ruth to come Katie and I would talk about how to teach her about the world, how to talk to her about things that matter, and how to teach her about Jesus. The first thing I told Ruth when we got to FaceTime from the hospital was the gospel! (Jesus died for your sins…none of which you’ve committed yet!) On the way home from the hospital Katie cried and cried telling Ruth about why people have their houses decorated right now—”because we’re celebrating Jesus being born as a baby just like you!”

So to Ruth, Eddie, and Emma: Aunt Sarah loves you. Not just in a hearts-and-flowers type of way but in a would-die-for-you, will-fight-for-you, is-always-praying-for-you type of way. The only way I’m able to do that is because Jesus loves me that way. He gave up His life for me—to make a way for me to be friends with God—something I couldn’t accomplish or earn on my own. Jesus loves you that way, too. He wants to be your friend, too.

Yours, too, friend! I hope the new year is filled with joy, peace, and everlasting love for you all.